SAMVAD &nbsp :: Dialogue of Life

 Bhakti Theology Song 1355

1355 My need

 

I need both

Solitude and peace

You should protect me

By giving them

Both simplicity and

Patience should join

You should

Fill them within me

 

Giving proper

Place for that

Providing a

Calm atmosphere for that

Remembering only you

And renouncing me

I need a life

To live in you

 

Whichever hurdle

That might come

I should overcome

and walk

You should protect me

Not losing it again

By doing any kind of

Mistake again

 

I never got this boon

By asking you

I don’t have even

The qualification to ask it

I don’t have

Even the strength

To preserve it

Which came on its own

 

As you know

My need

And gave this boon

On your own

I should understand

The greatness of it

And you alone should

Help me for that

 

Over Lording me

By overcoming me

Remembering all 

My shortcomings

You should protect me

By putting a fence around me

And you should do it

Coming on your own

 

As I do

My part

As your grace

Is with me

You should help

To remain permanently both

The solitude and peace

Which I sought

 

Gurukulam, 31-03-2022, 11.45 p.m.

 

The one fearful scenario in life is the fear of missing something which you like much. Both me and my mother are caught in the fear these days. First my mother hesitated to move back to the ashram. In a way I tricked her by telling that we are coming here only for two weeks but slowly helped her to understand my plan and needs. Now she is adjusted to this life and now prefers to live only here particularly with me alone. Because along with my siblings we have planned to shift her to Chennai to stay with my sister and my mother began to lament about it and complain to everyone who visits the ashram. Her one question to me and to others is: when I am ready to live here why again tossing me from place to place. I understand her plight. Old people never like to move from a place in which they managed to adjust their life.  The same is my case. What if I am forced to again move from the ashram due to any reason—particularly related health or the needs of my mother.  Because my one principle is: people first.  So I told my friend Kannan that in case my mother needs my presence with her to spend the rest of her life relatively peacefully I won’t mind going anywhere to stay with her.  At the same time the mere thought of going back to any noisy place with lots of pollution again brings a shrilling fear within me. So I was pleading with the Lord to create such a scenario where I can continue to stay a few more years in the ashram.  Because when I shifted back to the ashram on 5^th September 2021 I was not sure that I would stay this long here. Even I shifted back with lots of hesitation and questions in mind keeping the needs of my mother.  So this blessing of coming back to the ashram is again a gift from the Lord and unless He helps me to keep that blessing I cannot do it.

 

1355 எனது தேவை

 

தனிமை அமைதி

இரண்டும் வேண்டும்

அவற்றைத் தந்து

காக்க வேண்டும்

எளிமை பொறுமை

இணைய வேண்டும்

என்னுள் அவற்றை

நிரப்ப வேண்டும்

 

அதற்கு ஏற்ற

இடமும் தந்து

அமைதியான ஒரு

சூழல் அமைத்து

உன்னை நினைந்து

என்னைத் துறந்து

உன்னில் வாழும்

வாழ்வும் வேண்டும்

 

தடைகள் இதற்கு

எது வந்தாலும்

தகர்ந்து எறிந்து

நடக்க வேண்டும்

தவறு செய்து

மீண்டும் அதனை

இழந் திடாமல்

காக்க வேண்டும்

 

கேட்டுப் பெற்ற

வரமும் இல்லை

கேட்கும் தகுதி

என்னில் இல்லை

வலியத் தேடி

வந்த வாய்ப்பைத்

தக்க வைக்கப்

பெலனும் இல்லை

 

எனது தேவை

உணர்ந்த நீயும்

வலியத் தேடித்

தந்த வரத்தின்

உயர்வை நானும்

புரிய வேண்டும்

அதற்கு நீதான்

உதவ வேண்டும்

 

என்னை மீறி

என்னை ஆண்டு

எனது குறைகள்

அனைத்தும் நினைந்து

வேலி அடைத்துக்

காக்க வேண்டும்

வலிய வந்து

செய்ய வேண்டும்

 

எனது பங்கை

நானும் செய்ய

உனது அருளும்

கூட இருக்க

தேடும் அமைதி

நாடும் தனிமை

நிலைத்து நிற்க

உதவ வேண்டும்

 

குருகுலம், 31-03-2022, இரவு, 11.45